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Nighttime Bliss

Nighttime bliss. Aloof in my thoughts just wondering and thinking about anything and everything that comes to mind. There, in the dark is where I feel the most mundane, connected to the Earth and to myself. I rule the world, not in dream, but during the moments before I fall asleep; and everything is okay in that moment. Where does the connection go when the sunlight breaks in through my window? Reality comes crashing in every day. I wake up with a knot in my stomach every morning, a sick feeling is not a proper wakeup call, but it sure does waken me. My brain starts rushing and my body shuts down to a point where all I want to do is lay there and make my own rules and own dirt path. No motivation, no desire and it’s weird because I’ve not given up, I’m just lost. It’s been a hard pill to swallow, but I take it every day, like clockwork. 
Nighttime bliss… moon I yearn for you. Perhaps it’s the idea of a new day to come, but once again I ask what happens between nightfall and day break? Where do I go? Where am I? It’s all just an everlasting ride that I’m so desperate to get off of, but there’s not stop in sight. 


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